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New Comics Haul Week Of 8.31.22

I come to you 𝒶-𝓌𝓇𝒾𝑔𝑔𝓁𝒾𝓃’ in the mucous grip of a wee sickness, a vaguely but profoundly uncomfortable eel hoisted from my rightful mire into a rowboat rented for a poorly-conceived bachelor party. Will they figure out how to cook me before Clarf is reduced to a skeleton in a corduroy tux? Will Glebra will still have him as her spouse without, as stipulated in their vows, “the steadfast presence of dat ass”? Do the servers have any miniature pigs in a blanket left, and if so could the swing by the altar? My license fully entitles me to bind a human woman and a skeleton in holy matrimony, but my officiant contract entitles me to my weight in puff pastry and Hebrew Nationals.

DEARLY BELOVED, we are gathered here today in the name of New Comic Books. I am gathered here today on my couch wrapped in an afghan, zonked out of my zooper on sudafed and blearily half-watching The Eternals.

Play ball.

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So that’s me this week, gang. What did you all get? How much Batman did you buy without realizing it? Which movie from 1989 would you read a comic continuation of? You can’t say Jason Takes Manhattan, ’cause Elliott Kalan and Andrea Mutti already did it and it rules! Which Daredevil villain would you hire to do your yardwork? Lemme know in the comments!
Until next time, be good to yourselves, be good to each other, wear your goddamned masks, and if you see four lights, say four lights. Bye all my buddies!

I’ve got mouths to feed and thoughts to think through
I’ve got words to keep and lies to make true

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